*The Gospel plan includes experincing both positive and negative emotions
In my journey, I came across an amazing podcast by Brooke Castillo. She explained how our emotions are 50/50, that is 50% positive and 50% negative. And that's how it's supposed to be. It's part of life to experience both positive and negative emotions. I found this so fascinating because it goes right along with doctrine found in the scriptures. In 2 Nephi 2:23 it says, "wherefore they would have remained in a state of innocence, having no joy, for they knew no misery; doing no good, for they knew no sin." So when Adam and Eve were in the Garden of Eden, innocent and naked, they did not experience joy or sorrow, excitement or stress, anger or peace, etc because without partaking of the fruit, they lived in a state of innocence: without wisdom, without knowing good or evil, and what appears to even have been void of emotion. And Eve wanted more. She wanted understanding, she wanted children--she wanted and felt compelled and impressed to desire more. It was not until after they fell, that they experienced joy because they had sorrow to compare it to. I believe that as much as we'd like to avoid the negative emotions in life, that will not improve our positive ones.
When we become aware of our emotions and even welcome them as part of life's experience, fully analyzing all we feel, we learn to get comfortable being uncomfortable and we find the negative thought behind that emotion easier. We'll often experience a positive emotion afterwards just by being aware.
Within minutes of listening to Brooke's podcast, I had a thought. "Christmas is coming." There it was. The topic that brings on all sorts of thoughts and consequential emotions for me. I began to feel anxiety, and I thought--what a perfect opportunity to try out Brooke's podcast lesson! I wanted to try experiencing the emotion rather than avoiding it. So I laid on my bed and just let it come. I noticed everything. A tightness in my throat/neck area that felt uncomfortable. I just laid there and became acutely aware of what was going on in my mind and body. I could hear the thoughts behind the anxiety that were running amuck, such as "I hate Christmas. I'm the only one who does the Christmas shopping. It's so much pressure on me to make everyone happy and get them what they want. There's too much to do. I can't do it all. I'm overwhelmed..." It seemed like just a couple of minutes at most that these thoughts flashed through my mind, and then I began to notice a sudden clarity. I decided with all this awareness going on that I could take control of those thoughts and reroute them. And then the anxiety began to dissipate and subside. And as I began to form new, controlled and purposeful thoughts, such as, "I'm really good at Christmas shopping. Sometimes I enjoy it. I love getting a good deal on a gift. I can ask for help and teach others to be good at it. I can ask others to get me a wish list. I can refocus Christmas on the more meaningful things rather than all the shopping..." I began to feel a calming peace, just as intense or more as the original anxiety as I began believing on purpose. And as I've reflected back on it, it was actually pretty cool to become aware and get comfortable and even embrace a negative emotion rather than fight or avoid it. And it made my positive emotions following the anxiety so much sweeter.
Isn't that what we learn in the scriptures? Doesn't Paul and Peter teach of the great treasure more valuable than gold to feel joy and misery? The joy of our trials? To struggle and experience trials and negative emotions is what teaches us and helps us grow. Elder Uchtdorf, in his talk "Our Great Adventure" says, "we knew we would gain precious treasures, including experiencing the intense joys and sorrows of mortality....We tend to lose sight of our great quest, preferring comfort and ease over growth and progress." Notice he said part of the precious treasures of life include sorrows of mortality. These treasures certainly don’t seem like treasures at the time, but I’m discovering that if we do not experience deep sorrow and heart ache, we would not experience the deep joys of life either. We cannot have one without the other. And that is why they are the treasures of mortality. Life would be bland and boring without the good and the bad emotions. We need to experience both if we want all God intended for us. If we resist the negative, avoid anything uncomfortable or hard, we're resisting growth. Yet we came here to do just that! So it's all part of God's plan.
https://thelifecoachschool.com/podcast/97/
Your Great Adventure Ensign Nov 2019
When we become aware of our emotions and even welcome them as part of life's experience, fully analyzing all we feel, we learn to get comfortable being uncomfortable and we find the negative thought behind that emotion easier. We'll often experience a positive emotion afterwards just by being aware.
Within minutes of listening to Brooke's podcast, I had a thought. "Christmas is coming." There it was. The topic that brings on all sorts of thoughts and consequential emotions for me. I began to feel anxiety, and I thought--what a perfect opportunity to try out Brooke's podcast lesson! I wanted to try experiencing the emotion rather than avoiding it. So I laid on my bed and just let it come. I noticed everything. A tightness in my throat/neck area that felt uncomfortable. I just laid there and became acutely aware of what was going on in my mind and body. I could hear the thoughts behind the anxiety that were running amuck, such as "I hate Christmas. I'm the only one who does the Christmas shopping. It's so much pressure on me to make everyone happy and get them what they want. There's too much to do. I can't do it all. I'm overwhelmed..." It seemed like just a couple of minutes at most that these thoughts flashed through my mind, and then I began to notice a sudden clarity. I decided with all this awareness going on that I could take control of those thoughts and reroute them. And then the anxiety began to dissipate and subside. And as I began to form new, controlled and purposeful thoughts, such as, "I'm really good at Christmas shopping. Sometimes I enjoy it. I love getting a good deal on a gift. I can ask for help and teach others to be good at it. I can ask others to get me a wish list. I can refocus Christmas on the more meaningful things rather than all the shopping..." I began to feel a calming peace, just as intense or more as the original anxiety as I began believing on purpose. And as I've reflected back on it, it was actually pretty cool to become aware and get comfortable and even embrace a negative emotion rather than fight or avoid it. And it made my positive emotions following the anxiety so much sweeter.
Isn't that what we learn in the scriptures? Doesn't Paul and Peter teach of the great treasure more valuable than gold to feel joy and misery? The joy of our trials? To struggle and experience trials and negative emotions is what teaches us and helps us grow. Elder Uchtdorf, in his talk "Our Great Adventure" says, "we knew we would gain precious treasures, including experiencing the intense joys and sorrows of mortality....We tend to lose sight of our great quest, preferring comfort and ease over growth and progress." Notice he said part of the precious treasures of life include sorrows of mortality. These treasures certainly don’t seem like treasures at the time, but I’m discovering that if we do not experience deep sorrow and heart ache, we would not experience the deep joys of life either. We cannot have one without the other. And that is why they are the treasures of mortality. Life would be bland and boring without the good and the bad emotions. We need to experience both if we want all God intended for us. If we resist the negative, avoid anything uncomfortable or hard, we're resisting growth. Yet we came here to do just that! So it's all part of God's plan.
https://thelifecoachschool.com/podcast/97/
Your Great Adventure Ensign Nov 2019
Comments
Post a Comment