*Welcome! I'm MarciMom, self-sufficient, God-reliant

Hi. Let me introduce myself. I am MarciMom. I’m a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I am a disciple of Christ. I’m a daughter, a wife, a mom, a sister, an aunt, and a grandma! And I’m over 50 years young, although my kids say I don’t look a day over 29. Love those kids! I’ve had struggles just like the best of you. Marriage struggles. Parenting struggles. Faith crisis struggles. Health struggles. Money struggles. Extended family struggles. Self-worth struggles. You know. Most of the normal life stuff. But over the last couple of years, I am learning and growing in the gospel, learning so much about Him and myself—and I’m making changes. Because you can’t change anyone else but yourself.  And it has the greatest rewards when you do. I’m talking sweet joy. Because I started to discover who I really am. Because I started to discover who He really is. And then I wanted to change and become someone I was always meant to be. Someone amazing! And I found out that I already am! The future is bright. Watch. Out. World. It only gets better from here!

Before I got married and had kids, I was pretty much perfect. I had great parents, lived a good life, did everything right, and then some. Then I became a mom. Found out I wasn’t so perfect. I wasn’t patient. I had a temper. I wasn’t good hangry. Being a mom helped me realize just how imperfect I was. I messed up regularly but...I was normal.  I was a mom who had awful pregnancies. I’m talking the miserable, wish you were dead, knock me out till I’m dilated, kind of pregnancies. And I had six of them, one of them a miscarriage. So I have 5 kids. Great, amazing kids with gifts and strengths and weaknesses and problems just like me. And now I am a grandma! Best thing ever!!
 First off, just gotta say. I’m not a super mom. I kinda thought I was, and then I saw other moms. I’m not them. (Hint: Comparison is the thief of joy.) I never made my kids school lunches, heck, I rarely made them breakfast. Do I feel bad about this? Not really. Just sometimes when I see other moms… (Quit comparing yourself, Marci!!)  Okay, so I didn’t make my kids school lunches. I want them to be independent and self-sufficient from a young age. There were times I felt bad about that, like maybe I wasn’t a nice or a good mom--I especially felt this way when I would see other moms.  But now I'm overcoming that crazy phenomenon because I am MarciMom. And that is the best mom my kids could ever have, inspired by God Himself. My kids have me for a reason! And I am the best mom for them. (Ok--I totally gained that testimony from my visiting teacher, Stephanie, back in the day. Thanks, Stephanie--it never left me!!)

I take pride in the fact that when I show up with something special for my kids—they are really excited and grateful because I just don’t spoil my kids very often. And I think they’ve learned to be happy and ok because I didn’t always create happiness for them. I don't think Heavenly Father spoils us--but he does spoil us, or blesses us, just the right amount so that we're not rotten unless we chose to be. Self-sufficiency brings confidence, and knowing how to take care of ourselves and how to create our own happiness brings joy. But I usually find that I am most happy and at peace when I have complete trust and confidence in Him and His plan for me. In other words, I have joy when I am God-reliant. I love that term. Might have even made it up myself. That is my ultimate goal--to be completely God-reliant. That is my peaceful, happy place.

So, I’ve just let you in on some of my inadequacies and my opinionated views. I’m pretty far from perfect. But I’ve recently learned that this life is not about being a super woman, super mom, or a super wife. It’s about being a super Me. And I can’t do that alone, and it’s gonna take, like, forever. But I have forever!!  Yes, I seriously need and must learn to depend on the atonement.  My relationship with my Father is key. And I slack in this area a lot. But then I get better, and then I get bad again. Cuz life happens. But it allows us to repent and grow closer to Him as we do, and access the atonement and feel and become amazing again--wait, did I forget that I was amazing all along? (That was totally an incomplete run-on sentence—my daughter will notice, so I gotta admit it.) It’s all part of the plan… Sin, repent, feel joy, repeat. I think the goal is—well there’s not just one—there’s a ton—but the idea is to learn and make progress, pick yourself back up when you fall, stop blaming the world for your problems, learn how to supervise your mind, understand who you are, and do it all again next week. Right? So much easier said than done. And so the journey to achieve joy, eternal life, and exaltation begins… or just keeps on going…on and on…with a few moments of success here and there. 
So, if you're still interested in how I have found success, joy, peace, and became ok with feeling miserable sometimes (because it is actually normal and part of life), you are welcome to keep reading the amazing miracle of my life that has changed and continues to change for the better when I pay attention to my God and all He gives me.

This blog is really all about the insights I'm discovering along my journey, and how we can make changes within ourselves by taking control of our thoughts, feelings, and actions as we build our relationship with God.